HI, ARE YOU NEW HERE?

Gee, how can you tell? So last week I decided to stick my toe back into the dating World. There are so many choices when it comes to online dating website that it can be a bit overwhelming. Back in 2009, I gave Plenty of Fish a try and decided since it was free it wouldn’t be a complete loss if I hated it.

My experience night one was bit stressful. Maybe I was in a Patron haze back in the day, but shit, I don’t remember there being so many god damn questions. I suppose if I didn’t want to answer the questions I could have signed up for Tinder. But that is a whole new shit show that I am not ready to jump into.

So I answered the stupid, bull shit questions. And BTW, some of theme are incredibly fucking stupid. Example: “Do you have a car?” I get why this is important to people. Maybe the question isn’t so bad, but the option to respond with “I prefer not to say” is some real horse shit. Clearly, if that’s the fucked up, vague response you’re a giving, you are doing it because your ass doesn’t have a car. (I’m getting off my soap box, at least for now!)

I uploaded three photos that were from the last few weeks and waited. Seriously, I think I had my first message within five minutes. And another and another and soon I felt like my head was being held under fucking water and I was feeling all sorts of anxiety.

Some of the most memorable messages I received:

“hey baby”

“Your beautiful”

“Your hot”

“:)”

How exactly was I supposed to respond to that? And for fucks can you please learn the difference between your and you’re?

So I messaged back and forth with quite a few guys. Talked about meeting a few for coffee or drinks. I ended up meeting one guy earlier this week. But I’m not ready to share that experience because this is just an introduction post.

A fun fact about me:

I once went on 30 dates in 30 days with 30 different guys while living and working in NYC… It was fucking exhausting. There were lots of shitty guys that just wanted to bang. Some wanted to be friends and bang, and I had a few of those.

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