Breadcrumbs are typically used to bind meatballs or coat something for baking or frying. But the term breadcrumbing is fairly new in the dating world. Although, I promise you, it’s really not a new trend, it just has a catchy, new name.
The all knowing and wonderful Urban Dictionary defines breadcrumbing as:
The act of sending out flirtatious, but non-committal text messages (ie “breadcrumbs”) to members of the opposite sex in order to lure a sexual partner without expending much effort.
But let’s be honest, this act of breadcrumbing or as I like to call it planting many little fucking seeds happens more than just online dating and via text messaging.
Here’s a perfect example from last night’s Girl’s Night Out. After we got shit faced, danced, and acted a fool we needed to get some greasy diner food. There were two guys in the both next to us that kept turning around or coming over to talk to us. They were in town for work blah, fucking blah. It seems like that a common story here in Charlotte. Back to the story, so when they realized we weren’t interested and the conversation wasn’t going to go past small talk, they moved on to a table of girls literally three feet away from us. And guess what? When they showed no interest, they moved on to another table.
I get it. If you want to look at dating or in this case the quest for a piece of ass as farming it makes sense. Any good farmer is probably going to over plant. He needs to ensure that he will yield some sort of profitable return. So the good farmer plants lots and lots of seeds. And if some of those seeds don’t grow, he has others that will.
We all people that love to plant multiple seeds, especially as the weekend gets closer. It’s like fucking clockwork. “So what are your weekend plans?” This guy or girl asks this same question to a few or a lot of people. Once they get a response they cut some people from the list because of a response like going out with my boyfriend or out of town. The people who left their weekend plans pretty open will get thrown another crumb or in the case of the farmer a little more water. And so it goes from there.
A wise guy I meet just a few days ago on Plenty of Fish said something pretty spot on about dating. I am totally paraphrasing here, but the gist of it was that people meet someone, they like them, but we are so obsessed with finding the better option that we are always looking for the greener pasture. I would say that’s pretty accurate. Why are we never satisfied? Why do we throw out multiple feelers and see who has the best offer? It’s like dating has turned into some heated real estate multiple offer situation. It’s bullshit!
And that brings up an important question- When do you take down your online dating profile after you meet someone? Hmmmm, perhaps that’s my next topic for blogging.
Look, even though I have been out of the dating game for quite a few years I still like to live vicariously through my friends that are going out with one guy on Monday and another on Wednesday and flirting with 15 others on Tinder. I know the games and how they work.